Knob Shots

As soon as I became single, and available, I started getting sent photographs of men’s junk. Not randomly from google images searches of “penis”, but from specific men. Some of them are men I already know, and some of them are men I have just acquired and who are trying to chat me up.

Penises are not pretty. Do men not realise this? I mean don’t get me wrong, I am a fan of the penis as an item. When applied correctly it is very useful. However, the penis itself is not what attracts me to a man. It is not even my focal point during sex. The turn ons are cheeky smiles, warm eyes, strong arms, firm butts. Yes a nicely sized penis is appealing but as a device, not as an item of eye candy.

The smart men send photos of themselves smiling, possibly shirtless, revealing just enough of the solid shoulders to show you they’re strong and toned, but not so much as to reveal everything too soon. The less smart ones go straight in with the willy.

“Look what I’ve got, isn’t it the most remarkably exquisite penis you have ever seen? Come hither and let me woo you”

Or words to that effect.

In general genitalia isn’t particularly attractive. I am not above the sexy selfie (no not naked, just attractively lit and minimally clothed) when seducing my prey. But I would never send a legs akimbo “here’s my foof” photo. I have no desire to show my foof off at the best of times, it’s a means to an end not the decoration on the woman cake. So why do so many men do it with their willies?

If you’re a man who is reading this, and who enjoys sending out knob shots to the girls he is attempting to get into bed, please stop dear. Yes it’s a lovely penis, and I’m sure you are very good at doing things with it, but must you photograph it at every given opportunity? Talk to the girl, show her your body, flirt with her, but let the penis not be your main focus. I can assure you it isn’t her main focus. Never once has a girl friend told me she had anything from a one night stand to a full blown relationship based on the quality of a dick pic. Ever. Ever ever ever.

Technology makes navigating the singles market both fascinating and concerning. I’ve seen more penises recently than I have in my whole life, and most of them attached to men who’s faces I’m not particularly familiar with yet! These are the men who I am NOT arranging dates with. Bless them and their penile pride.


About J.J. Barnes

Author of The Lilly Prospero Series Writer and Podcaster at Blogger at Rose And Mum And More Contributor to The Huffington Post
This entry was posted in Body Image, Love and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Knob Shots

  1. Misfit says:

    Haha!! Nice one!

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